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2012 Resolution

Friday, January 6, 2012

Jesse and I are a little late in writing down our goals for our marriage, businesses, life this year. We have this Saturday off, together! Free of all plans. So maybe we can cozy up by the fire and get to work.

1. Do one pinterest craft per month. I have seen this on other people’s blogs, but the feeling is mutual. I pin so much, but then I never get around to following through, and just have craft envy. This year, I am going to work on fixing that.

2. Read one book a month, and blog my book review. Right now I am reading Kisses from Katie. Any recommendations for future months out there?

3. Sew one item for my wardrobe every month. The last day of 2011 I sewed this:

4.Date night once a week with Jesse. Although it seems like most nights are date nights, when it is the two of us eating dinner at the table, or a restaurant, I think we need to be more diligent about picking a night and sticking with it so that it is a priority when our kids get home. Although the night may be different every week, depending on schedule, I want to make the night that we call out for date night, special, to use it for growing and staying connected in our marriage, maybe we will try something new, or re-cap our week, or just spend time investing in each other. I don’t know how this will pan out, but I will be sure to report back.

5. Journal (at least 3 times a week). I want to capture my prayers and be able to look back and see how God has worked, moved in my life. I want to capture my feelings, my longing for our children to come home. I want to write it down, the old fashioned way, even though, for some reason, I feel like this is an “unattainable” goal, one that I long to do but keep putting off. So this is the year.

The funny thing about goals that I have come to realize is that God is in control and one of the biggest things I have struggled with is that my goals, plans & expectations sometimes aren’t His. I want to revisit my 30 before 30 goals, I feel like my priorities have changed since I wrote them well over a year ago so maybe some of them won’t get accomplished and maybe they will (I need to run a half marathon). Maybe that will happen this year too. God willing, we will have 4 beautiful children’s feet running through the house and maybe I won’t have time to craft, but instead will be rocking, holding, feeding, playing. Hopefully we will spend time in Uganda, experiencing parenthood for the first time. Nevertheless, I want to be diligent with the time I have here on this earth, thankful for each day, using my time well and my life to glorify God. Although each of the above goals may seem trivial, the activities are ones that calm me, remind me of our true purpose, renew my soul. So here is to 2012 – and here is to blogging more too!

2012

by admin

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2011 Wrap

Friday, January 6, 2012

2011 was an amazing year for Jesse and I. Although we were tested, stretched, and sometimes disappointed we were simultaneously being given such incredible joy, grace, provision and a sense of awe through it all. I would like to say that we walked out of 2011 better for everything that occurred in its midst and I truly believe we did.

On New Years Eve, Jesse and I had a quiet dinner at home, where we talked about our highs and lows of the year. We then went and visited a few friends, though we were home and snuggled up tight before the clock struck midnight. Although our Top Chef Wednesday & home group peeps, Adam & Heather, don’t know it yet, I think we are going to do it again. (Result = very successful).

Highlights:

1. Our faith, pursuit, and awe at our God and His son, Jesus Christ has increased in a way that I cannot describe in words. I want more of Him. I revel in His delight in us, even though we are sinners. I desire to learn more and more about Him, and feel this sense of overwhelming peace and joy in the ability to lay all of my worry, fear, and lacking at His feet. I feel like I am finally grasping that although we may not understand, or necessary “like” it at the time, His plan, that is for His glory and our joy, is truly the best plan. That suffering will occur, but that He is sovereign. Jesse said that there was a noticeable difference/a change that occurred in me as we walked through 2011, in which I became, free-er, more laid back, less stressed out, and more comfortable with the ebb and flow of life as I began to consistently recognize that He is in control and He is good. I think that as I focused on the true purpose of our time on earth (His glory) instead of what I thought was supposed to happen or how my “plan” wasn’t coming to fruition, that the more I laid everything down, the more I depended on the work of Jesus on the cross, the Gospel, the more I recognized that only He can save (I do not deserve such a gift and I did nothing to earn it, but was given it freely by His love), the more joy I have felt during the everyday, during the highs, and lows. I am so thankful for the grace that has been poured over me this year as I learned, and stretched and grew.

2. Our marriage. We have discovered such a sense of intimacy, faith, trust, and hope in our God and in each other this year. Our marriage has been blessed in such an amazing and sweet way by these things.

3. Our adoption process. This process has brought so much joy into our lives and our kids are not home yet. I long to see the faces of our children, who He has so perfectly made in His image. I am expectant, expecting, and thankful. I pray that 2012 brings them home, but I will trust in God as he reveals His timing for us.

4. Our home group. I don’t know what to say about this group of people other than I love each of them dearly. If you were a fly on the wall on our Sunday night meetings, our girls lunches, nights out, loving on each others children like they are your own, seeing each of them serve, support and truly cover each other and us in prayer, you would think, those people have known each other forever. But you would be wrong. Our home group officially came together in March. Our first study was Tim Keller’s Gospel in Life. This is how the first meeting went: “Hello some of you that I have never met, lets talk about our idols, lets share in our suffering and joy, lets come together and pray and feel the spirit move in the room, lets lay all of our junk in front of you and say, this is me. Sound good?” It sounds crazy, but it came together with a seamless perfection that could only be God given. These people, our dear friends that we truly feel like we have known forever, even though we have not, they love Jesus. They are not perfect, they are not afraid to call out sin in themselves or in us, they have testimony’s that truly give glory to our God, they are living out the gospel in this life, they have been the face of Jesus to us, they are true community in which I have never, ever experienced in such a way before. This group is crazy amazing, and we love them. I should dedicate an entire post to introducing them to you.

5. My mom and Ron moving to Dallas. It is wonderful to be starving and have nothing in your pantry, and call your mom and have her invite you to dinner. It is magic to come home and your house is miraculously clean and you wonder how your husband had time to do that (he didn’t), it is a process to sort out how your relationship works as adults living in the same city, it is humbling, joyous and fun to have an amazing support system 5 minutes away.

Lowlights:

1. This is interesting and I think this is where we have seen God work the most, where Jesus has redeemed our suffering and showed us that His way is the best way. It was likely that I started 2011 in tears. I felt a constant tug on my heart that we were supposed to adopt, yet I wanted to get pregnant as well. So each period (sorry if TMI), brought disappointment and a sense of relief. It was weird, it was like I was at war with myself, I was trying to live in two worlds, I knew that God had so clearly called us to adopt and that he was in control of how He had planned for our family to grow, but I was trying to live in the “world” too, I selfishly wanted to be a cute pregnant mommy to be. I don’t know. I am sure I will come back to this topic at some point later. But, when Jesse said, lets do it, and we were accepted with our agency, it was truly one of the most joyous things that I have ever experienced. It changed us and we are being changed by the process. Although there were lots of tears and questions, we have seen redemption and grace, we have been changed by the Gospel in such a physical, spiritual, life-altering way this year that although we have had “lows” we have seen them being used for “highs.”

I saw this tweeted this morning – ” ‘@LiveAtPassion: Louie: Brokenness is the bow from which God launches the arrows of healing. #Passion2012‘ amen.” Jesse and I have truly seen that play out in our lives this year.

2011, Adoption

by admin

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Dreaming Big Dreams Giveaway

Friday, December 16, 2011

Giveaway! I am so honored that Jamie Ivey is featuring Twenty 9 Freckles today and hosting a giveaway on her awesome blog, Dreaming Big Dreams. Head over to Dreaming Big Dreams and enter to win!!!

This probably sounds a little stalker-ish, but I love Jamie’s blog and have been following it for some time now. Her blog was one of the first “adoption” blogs I started reading. Her posts are always honest, funny, true, and inspiring. So go check out her blog and add it to reader so you can become a blog stalker too

A little bit about Twenty 9 Freckles:

Jesse and I started Twenty 9 Freckles as a creative outlet for me and a way to raise money for our adoption. Growing up, and well into law school, my friends always called me the “un-crafty” one. Seriously, it was bad. I tried to make a tutu one time (don’t ask why I was making a tutu in law school) and had to take it to my mom to finish. I would get frustrated and either convince someone else to finish it, or throw it away. When I married my husband, it is like a light switched in my brain. He encouraged me, taught me to sew, and just looked at life in a different way. He is truly an artist and is definately at work with me behind the scenes at Twenty 9 Freckles. Once I started sewing, I couldn’t get enough! It is such a creative outlet for me, plus there is something about following the lines and the hum of the machine that is relaxing. I started by sewing for our home, and then for baby gifts. When we started our adoption process, Jesse encouraged me to start the business to sell all the things I was making and so Twenty 9 Freckless began. So thank you for supporting us, our adoption and our business. We are so happy to provide you with handmade and unique items and we hope that you love them as much as we do!

2011, Adoption Fundraiser, Sewing

by admin

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He is Coming

Friday, December 9, 2011

Advent: Waiting for the Coming of the Messiah.

Realistically, I sometimes, selfishly, think that the events that Jesse and I experience in our lives are individual to us. Its not fair, why is this not working, why why why. It is easy to get wrapped up in our culture where everything is fast paced, we want it now, and we don’t want to suffer or wait to “arrive” at the next best thing. Right now (and really for at least the last year and a half), Jesse and I have been in a season of waiting and what we, or at least I (sometimes I think my husband is a saint), have struggled with is wanting it now. Although I know that the Lord’s timing is perfect, I want our kids home. I want to be a Mama. My selfish heart does not want to wait.

But what Jesse and I have experienced during this season, by the Grace of God, is a sweet, sweet time, where we have been placed in a position to depend utterly on the Lord. We have called out to Jesus, we have been sanctified in ways that I would have never imagined (though I know it is not over, nor will it ever be) and our lives been changed for the better, our marriage has gotten stronger, more intimate, and through our adoption process, we have had the wonderful opportunity to share the Gospel with others in ways we would have never imagined. We have truly felt the nature and character of Jesus extending grace and mercy to us during this time, as well as being confident in the fact that Jesus is walking with us through this waiting, through the good days and the days that there are tears. Looking back, I wouldn’t trade it or the waiting we have in front of us, though while in the day-to-day sometimes I have wished that it was over.

All of that to say, that when we started reading Behold the Lamb of God: An Advent Narrative, I wasn’t expecting to get a swift kick in the butt, and a wonderful realization that we are not in this alone. That others have walked before us in events we have experienced, and that they too, have waited on the Lord to answer prayers and despite not knowing how/if/when he was going to answer, they served Him and loved Him with all of their being. 40 years of waiting, 400 years of waiting, and many many more years waiting on the Messiah to be born, to fulfill God’s promise, yet they relied and waited and trusted the Lord with their story. Our year and a half, and only 5 months officially into the adoption process seems like nothing to what they experienced. Another kick in the butt. The gospel, I need it. I am a sinner and Jesus came, he paid. He will come again. That is what this season is about.

The story of the Coming of Jesus the Messiah is filled with those, just like us, waiting on Jesus to come.

I would strongly recommend this book. We have had a crazy start to our December. I am slammed at work, we have had shoots, weddings, baby showers, parties, and Jesse has a big test this weekend that he has been studying like a mad-man for. But, every night I have looked forward to laying down and reading today’s story. To pause and reflect on Jesus, on the story of His coming and look forward to the future when He comes again. It has been refreshing, and good. I have even gone back and started reading again because it is that good. Here is what the Gospel Coalition said about it:

Behold the Lamb of God: An Advent Narrative traces the story of our need for and the coming of Christ all the way from the Garden of Eden to the manger in Bethlehem. In Deuteronomy, the Lord instructed his people to tell their children about him continually—when they were tucking them in at night, walking down the road, or sitting down to eat (Deut. 6:4-9). They were to read from Scripture when they had it in front of them, and talk about it when they didn’t. Think about all those “did you hear the one about” moments told without notes by the fire at night. This book collects those moments woven together to present the arc of the story of God’s redemption, culminating in the birth of Jesus.

This book has added a precious time with the Lord during our Advent season. We downloaded it on Kindle so Jesse and I have been reading it simultaneously, but I think I am going to order the hard copy to make sure we have it around for years to come. If you are interested, it isn’t too late to start!!!

More to come on other Advent activities that have been occurring in the Leos house.

2011, Book Reviews

by admin

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